Metyarpgemmeg Looptarpcut is a god.

She takes the form of a small, smart manatee.

Metyarpgemmeg Looptarpcut created energy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Metyarpgemmeg Looptarpcut, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Metyarpgemmeg Looptarpcut, she will have a low opinion of you.

Metyarpgemmeg Looptarpcut's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Metyarpgemmeg Looptarpcut's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not hurt voles.

3. Do not trade with those who eat spinach.

4. Always wear indigo.

5. Hide if nine great tits approach from the west.