Labbidfar is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, unsympathetic pig.

Labbidfar created Mount Everest five million years ago.

If you believe in Labbidfar, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Labbidfar, she will ignore you.

Labbidfar's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Labbidfar's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Labbidfar on top of all buildings.

2. Put Labbidfar first in all things.

3. Do not take Labbidfar's name in vain.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never hurt otters.