Sagtikflatnutxem is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, effective meerkat.

Sagtikflatnutxem created the planet Earth two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagtikflatnutxem, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Sagtikflatnutxem, it will be very unhappy.

Sagtikflatnutxem's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Sagtikflatnutxem's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick dolphins.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Dogs are unholy and should not be approached.