Benhiv is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, generous penguin.

Benhiv created the Small Magellanic Cloud eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Benhiv, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Benhiv, she will refuse to believe in you.

Benhiv's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Benhiv's Holy Commandments

1. Always help pigs in need.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate squirrels.

3. Always make sure there are no rats in a building before entering it.

4. Never wear kilts.

5. Porpoises are not to be trusted.