Govbonbid is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, annoying eagle.

Govbonbid created Africa eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Govbonbid, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Govbonbid, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Govbonbid's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Govbonbid's Holy Commandments

1. Govbonbid must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Retreat if seven dogs approach from the south.

3. Always look after injured porpoises.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.