Godwonril is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, unjust salamander.

Godwonril created bats five billion years ago.

If you believe in Godwonril, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Godwonril, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Godwonril's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Godwonril's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always help tortoises.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Godwonril.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.