Dibtarpwap is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, smart lobster.

Dibtarpwap created life eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Dibtarpwap, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Dibtarpwap, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Dibtarpwap's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Dibtarpwap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill porpoises.

2. Do not speak about rice.

3. Run away if three moths approach from the south.

4. Never bounce in the presence of mice.

5. Never write about gravity.