Cemkipdib is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, uncaring gerbil.

Cemkipdib created snails three billion years ago.

If you believe in Cemkipdib, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cemkipdib, she will send minions to preach to you.

Cemkipdib's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Cemkipdib's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never eat tomatoes.

5. Never hurt foxes.