Vedflapten is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, weak bat.

Vedflapten created the Sombrero Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vedflapten, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Vedflapten, she will jump up and down on your head.

Vedflapten's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Vedflapten's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always obey Vedflapten's priests.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never run in holy places.