Tikbensom is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, humorless sheep.

Tikbensom created everything that exists six million years ago.

If you believe in Tikbensom, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Tikbensom, she will come to you in dreams.

Tikbensom's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Tikbensom's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always stare at clouds.