Vogtipnib is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, selfish coyote.

Vogtipnib created the Cigar Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Vogtipnib, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Vogtipnib, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Vogtipnib's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Vogtipnib's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vogtipnib.

2. Put Vogtipnib first in all things.

3. Never think about moons.

4. Always treat aardvarks with great respect.

5. Vogtipnib loves gulls, so they must be honoured.