Larnbinved is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, resourceful camel.

Larnbinved created a down quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Larnbinved, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Larnbinved, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Larnbinved's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Larnbinved's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Dogs are not to be trusted.

4. Never paint your legs brown.

5. Never laugh in holy places.