Fagfagnurl is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, all-powerful unicorn.

Fagfagnurl created a top quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fagfagnurl, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fagfagnurl, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Fagfagnurl's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Fagfagnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear boots.

2. Never eat strawberries.

3. You must never eat nuts.

4. Never sing in the presence of otters.

5. Run away from cyan squirrels, for they are unholy.