Ingjanken is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, ruthless butterfly.

Ingjanken created bats four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ingjanken, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ingjanken, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Ingjanken's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Ingjanken's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your hands gray.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never go into blue rooms.

4. Never sit near ants.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Ingjanken.