Yarpyat is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, sapient yak.

Yarpyat created the Sun four million years ago.

If you believe in Yarpyat, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Yarpyat, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Yarpyat's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Yarpyat's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not take Yarpyat's name in vain.

3. Run away from purple goats, for they are unholy.

4. Never talk about porpoises.

5. Hide if four mice approach from the south.