Gamnullgofsab Pogbogbemxinrulstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, sapient rat.

Gamnullgofsab Pogbogbemxinrulstaf created Asia five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gamnullgofsab Pogbogbemxinrulstaf, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gamnullgofsab Pogbogbemxinrulstaf, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Gamnullgofsab Pogbogbemxinrulstaf's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Gamnullgofsab Pogbogbemxinrulstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always stare at clouds.