Likfagort Himbotlarg Raphuncum is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, witless snail.

Likfagort Himbotlarg Raphuncum created water two million years ago.

If you believe in Likfagort Himbotlarg Raphuncum, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Likfagort Himbotlarg Raphuncum, he will not care.

Likfagort Himbotlarg Raphuncum's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Likfagort Himbotlarg Raphuncum's Holy Commandments

1. Likfagort Himbotlarg Raphuncum loves moths, so they must be honoured.

2. Never think about comets.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Feed all hungry ants.

5. Hide from pink eagles for they are unholy.