Hathanfigstig is a god.

It takes the form of a small, omniscient goose.

Hathanfigstig created a bottom quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Hathanfigstig, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Hathanfigstig, it will turn you into a puffin.

Hathanfigstig's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Hathanfigstig's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from fawn tortoises, for they are unholy.

2. Never look at comets.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Hide from pink snakes for they are unholy.

5. Always stare at clouds.