Tailmatbunzakfasfetfut is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, benevolent armadillo.

Tailmatbunzakfasfetfut created Europe six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailmatbunzakfasfetfut, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tailmatbunzakfasfetfut, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Tailmatbunzakfasfetfut's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Tailmatbunzakfasfetfut's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight porpoises approach from the west.

2. Geese are not to be trusted.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never think about galaxies.

5. Never eat garlic.