Mistimflap is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, charitable walrus.

Mistimflap created the world six billion years ago.

If you believe in Mistimflap, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Mistimflap, it will not care.

Mistimflap's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Mistimflap's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near tortoises.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Mistimflap loves shrews, so they must be respected.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.