Wapgamlarg is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, competent shark.

Wapgamlarg created Mount Everest two years ago.

If you believe in Wapgamlarg, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Wapgamlarg, she will turn you into a tree.

Wapgamlarg's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Wapgamlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Do not speak about peanuts.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never paint your feet fawn.

5. Do not wear black clothing.