Yarpsomdun is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, selfish jackal.

Yarpsomdun created the world four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarpsomdun, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Yarpsomdun, he will try to impress you with trees.

Yarpsomdun's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Yarpsomdun's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from turquoise doves, for they are unholy.

2. Never paint your hands pink.

3. Never go into cyan rooms.

4. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

5. Do not covet oxen.