Figcudzedzed is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, strong whale.

Figcudzedzed created the Andromeda Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Figcudzedzed, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Figcudzedzed, he will turn you into a hamster.

Figcudzedzed's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Figcudzedzed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your legs.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.