Ominnurlstan is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, egotistical gerbil.

Ominnurlstan created a down quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Ominnurlstan, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Ominnurlstan, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Ominnurlstan's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Ominnurlstan's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Hide from orange turtles for they are unholy.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never write about stars.

5. Do not dye your hair turquoise.