Didtunyak is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, vain elephant.

Didtunyak created the Large Magellanic Cloud seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Didtunyak, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Didtunyak, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Didtunyak's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Didtunyak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Didtunyak.

3. Never feed wheat to eagles while wearing violet rings.

4. Always wear mauve.

5. Always help voles in need.