Wapgomwad is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, self-confident beaver.

Wapgomwad created dark matter three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapgomwad, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Wapgomwad, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Wapgomwad's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Wapgomwad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Wapgomwad.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never sing near shrews.