Ragarnbam is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, merciless hydra.

Ragarnbam created a down quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Ragarnbam, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ragarnbam, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Ragarnbam's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Ragarnbam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Retreat if five swans approach from the east.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Ragarnbam.