Fonstigpakkar is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, generous mongoose.

Fonstigpakkar created the planet Jupiter two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fonstigpakkar, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Fonstigpakkar, it will be mildly annoyed.

Fonstigpakkar's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Fonstigpakkar's Holy Commandments

1. Fonstigpakkar must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Retreat if six birds approach from the east.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.