Gidfunfoss is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, narcissistic fish.

Gidfunfoss created life two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gidfunfoss, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gidfunfoss, she will turn you into a puffin.

Gidfunfoss' most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Gidfunfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Gidfunfoss on top of all buildings.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Run away if eight nematodes approach from the south.

5. Never think about asteroids.