Midbodvig is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, humane gerbil.

Midbodvig created an up quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Midbodvig, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Midbodvig, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Midbodvig's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Midbodvig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Midbodvig must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Worship no other gods but Midbodvig.

4. Never hurt voles.

5. Do not stand on grass.