Omtkimortlogrow is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, amazing chicken.

Omtkimortlogrow created humanity nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Omtkimortlogrow, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Omtkimortlogrow, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Omtkimortlogrow's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Omtkimortlogrow's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat dogs with great respect.

2. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not cook food in pots.