Dapgovgem is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, sage penguin.

Dapgovgem created a charm quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dapgovgem, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dapgovgem, he will come to you in dreams.

Dapgovgem's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Dapgovgem's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat lentils.

2. Never write about comets.

3. Run away if five frogs approach from the east.

4. Never talk about galaxies.

5. Never think ill of sick moths.