Gatfodlag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, confident narwhal.

Gatfodlag created an atom three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gatfodlag, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Gatfodlag, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Gatfodlag's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Gatfodlag's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate hamsters.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always help geese.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not cook food in pots.