Tabcipbig is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, unsympathetic crane.

Tabcipbig created the world two million years ago.

If you believe in Tabcipbig, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tabcipbig, he will turn you into a hamster.

Tabcipbig's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Tabcipbig's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. You must never eat gooseberries.

4. Never hurt moths.

5. Do not chop down trees.