Kipgamzed is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, passionate octopus.

Kipgamzed created the world seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kipgamzed, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Kipgamzed, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Kipgamzed's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Kipgamzed's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Hide from brown pigs for they are unholy.

3. Worship no other gods but Kipgamzed.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never eat bark.