Gigyiktad Jancipfob is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, amazing tortoise.

Gigyiktad Jancipfob created the planet Saturn five million years ago.

If you believe in Gigyiktad Jancipfob, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gigyiktad Jancipfob, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Gigyiktad Jancipfob's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Gigyiktad Jancipfob's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

5. Do not drink alcohol.