Jad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, unsympathetic hippopotamus.

Jad created Europe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Jad, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jad, it will come to you in dreams.

Jad's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Jad's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat limes.

2. Always make sure there are no ants in a building before entering it.

3. Do not trade with those who eat beans.

4. Never think ill of sick monkeys.

5. Never think about gravity.