Vedquatnart is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, dishonourable manatee.

Vedquatnart created the Black Eye Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vedquatnart, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Vedquatnart, he will turn you into a dog.

Vedquatnart's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Vedquatnart's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Always help seals.

3. Moths are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not cook food in pots.