Gonfedgub is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, fussy raccoon.

Gonfedgub created an up quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gonfedgub, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Gonfedgub, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Gonfedgub's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Gonfedgub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Do not kill mice.

3. Never wear green shirts.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snails.

5. Never talk about cell theory.