Ziggebneg is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, dishonourable tortoise.

Ziggebneg created viruses nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ziggebneg, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ziggebneg, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Ziggebneg's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Ziggebneg's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if eight snakes approach from the west.

2. Never think ill of sick manatees.

3. Always treat turtles with great respect.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not speak about apples.