Tigbotsug is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, generous lobster.

Tigbotsug created the Sombrero Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tigbotsug, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Tigbotsug, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Tigbotsug's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Tigbotsug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear carbon on your body.

2. Erect four tin sculptures of Tigbotsug on top of important buildings.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not wear purple clothing.

5. Never run near aardvarks.