Beptagquagjabhatzodkomrap is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, overgenerous lion.

Beptagquagjabhatzodkomrap created parasitic wasps six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Beptagquagjabhatzodkomrap, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Beptagquagjabhatzodkomrap, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Beptagquagjabhatzodkomrap's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Beptagquagjabhatzodkomrap's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Erect a large copper sculpture of Beptagquagjabhatzodkomrap on top of all buildings.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Put Beptagquagjabhatzodkomrap first in all things.