Govgumjadvig is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, omnipotent duck.

Govgumjadvig created a Higgs boson two billion years ago.

If you believe in Govgumjadvig, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Govgumjadvig, she will come to you in dreams.

Govgumjadvig's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Govgumjadvig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not jump in public.

2. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Run away if four whales approach from the north.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.