Nartgoddap is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, all-knowing dryad.

Nartgoddap created the planet Venus three million years ago.

If you believe in Nartgoddap, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nartgoddap, it will refuse to believe in you.

Nartgoddap's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Nartgoddap's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Nartgoddap.

2. Always help sick doves.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Always take life seriously.