Vonfaddobpakcibgidspaggom is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, all-powerful dog.

Vonfaddobpakcibgidspaggom created humanity four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonfaddobpakcibgidspaggom, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Vonfaddobpakcibgidspaggom, he will turn you into a sheep.

Vonfaddobpakcibgidspaggom's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Vonfaddobpakcibgidspaggom's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. You must never eat carrots.