Shavlatstaf is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, wise naga.

Shavlatstaf created a top quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Shavlatstaf, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Shavlatstaf, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Shavlatstaf's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Shavlatstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

3. Never go into magenta rooms.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Always take life seriously.