Zodbestjamtamquartortnuldap is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, irritating squirrel.

Zodbestjamtamquartortnuldap created the Tadpole Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Zodbestjamtamquartortnuldap, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Zodbestjamtamquartortnuldap, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Zodbestjamtamquartortnuldap's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Zodbestjamtamquartortnuldap's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in holy places.

2. Never paint your hands purple.

3. You must pray to Zodbestjamtamquartortnuldap seven times a day.

4. Do not wear silver on your body.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.