Flaparttof is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, humane beaver.

Flaparttof created everything that exists eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Flaparttof, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Flaparttof, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Flaparttof's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Flaparttof's Holy Commandments

1. Flaparttof loves voles, so they must be respected.

2. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not make images of living things.