Zakvabnarnulltettigarwegwat is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, ruthless hippopotamus.

Zakvabnarnulltettigarwegwat created the planet Mars five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zakvabnarnulltettigarwegwat, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Zakvabnarnulltettigarwegwat, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Zakvabnarnulltettigarwegwat's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Zakvabnarnulltettigarwegwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never wear gray boots.

4. Zakvabnarnulltettigarwegwat must be the most important thing in your life.

5. You must love Zakvabnarnulltettigarwegwat.