Tapartyarpgepbotyamvonkbess is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, flying scorpion.

Tapartyarpgepbotyamvonkbess created the world three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tapartyarpgepbotyamvonkbess, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Tapartyarpgepbotyamvonkbess, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Tapartyarpgepbotyamvonkbess' most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Tapartyarpgepbotyamvonkbess' Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not eat beans.

3. Do not take Tapartyarpgepbotyamvonkbess' name in vain.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. You must never eat cherries.